The Raisin Man by Dann Wonser

The Raisin Man by Dann Wonser

I bet you anything my mom is better than yours. You probly don’t believe me, so I’m gonna prove it, and you’re gonna wish your mom was as good as mine.

Every day I get to stay in my jammies any time I want. Dad doesn’t even know ‘cause he goes to work.

I get to watch cartoons too. Dad lets me watch sometimes, but he says too many cartoons is bad for me. That’s stupid. I hate it. That’s why I like it better when it’s just me and my mom.

Me and Mom have a friend that’s just ours. We met him at church. Dad doesn’t go so he doesn’t know him. Buddy is the coolest. Every time he comes over Buddy brings me two baby boxes of raisins. I get to eat BOTH of them if I stay outside by myself for a half a hour. That’s as long as the Power Rangers. One time I got bored and tried to come in, but the door was locked. I banged the door, but Mom didn’t hear me. It’s ‘cause the radio was too loud. Mom says I can’t tell Dad when Buddy comes over, ‘cause Dad thinks lots of raisins have too much sugar. Dads can be so mean.

I can make fart noises with my hands. Wait…I can do it…okay it’s not working now. But I did it the other day. It was really funny.

One time Mom and Dad got in a fight. I was up in my room and Dad must have found out about the raisins, ‘cause he was yelling about Buddy. He was so mean he made Mom cry. And then he made her call Buddy, and I heard him ‘cause I listened through the vent. He yelled a bad word at Buddy. Dad never says bad words. Then he got in his truck and Mom yelled don’t do it. I don’t get it. Maybe he was gonna say sorry.

After Dad yelled I brought my Iron Man to church ‘cause I wanted to give it to Buddy. But I couldn’t ‘cause he was gone. Mom said he moved.

I’m still mad at Dad ‘cause he went on a vacation to Aunt DeeDee’s house in Washeeton. It’s not fair. How come we don’t get to go? Dads can be so mean. He’s been gone a long time. I miss my dad. I asked Mom if we could go ‘cause it’s only two Power Ranger shows to get to Washeeton but she said our car might break ‘cause it’s old.

Mom feels so bad for me ‘cause I miss my dad. She told me she has a surprise for me. That’s why she’s always on the innernet looking for people to be our friend.

So now I’m gonna prove to you my mom’s better than yours. After breakfast I was playing with my Legos behind the sofa and I heard her on the phone. She said come tomorrow, and bring chocolate raisins!

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Copyright Dann Wonser 2024